I have taken down my first angry black bear, and am on my way to an extremely beautiful and warm comforter. I have focused my efforts toward the smaller easier to manage bear, for their mauling capabilities are much less severe. 324 more of these little guys and I should have enough warm bear skin to cover my California queen size bed!Anyway, after a totally inappropriate and selfish uproar from Mother Nature, the Mater Batters have finally crushed their way past the TRE Huggers 17-9. From what started out as a close game, quickly took an ugly turn as the Master Batters went on a killing spree of hits, bludgeoning the game wide open in the 5th and 6th inning. Some speculate that performance enhancing drugs where used during these innings, however nothing was confirmed by looking at their bodies.
Sarah Brown didn't have the kind of game she had become accustom too on Sunday night. Her 2.00 ERA increased to 4.33 after giving up 9 runs in this 6 inning complete game. Brown is well on her way to breaking another complete game season record. The record is currently held by Brown during the 2007 season where she threw every single game, refusing to ever come out. 
Brown did however struggle with her balance and coordination during this win. "It seemed like she was falling down, rolling on the ground or throwing the ball away every chance she got," Tripodi said. A fan later confirmed that Brown was spotted earlier in the day riding the 'Gravitron' over and over again at the Blue Island Carnival. Nobody could have predicted the severity of the side effects given the amount of times she had ridden this spinning wheel of puke.
Brown did however struggle with her balance and coordination during this win. "It seemed like she was falling down, rolling on the ground or throwing the ball away every chance she got," Tripodi said. A fan later confirmed that Brown was spotted earlier in the day riding the 'Gravitron' over and over again at the Blue Island Carnival. Nobody could have predicted the severity of the side effects given the amount of times she had ridden this spinning wheel of puke. Cliff Barnett (0) and Mike 'Smergs' Schmirdla (57) provided the Master Batters with a much needed spark in the top of the 5th inning. Barnett lead the team with 5 plate appearances and 5 hits respectively. It is now clear to see his heart and mind are set on leading the team in every offensive category. It is also safe to speculate that Barnett might be using the Master Batters as a spring board to bigger and better opportunities.
Luke Tripodi (22) and Kellie Hasselbeck (2) held down the right side of the infield allowing no balls to pass. Combined, this tandem also lead the team in multiple swinging bunts.
Catcher Lauren Ritter filled in for 'Chatty' Cervenka after she was suspended indefinetly for 
a late night altercation with other members on the squad. Apparently Cervenka doesn't take kindly to people talking after 9:00pm on school nights. Despite all that, Cervenka is still expected back for next weeks contest. Ritter started off the game somewhat confused with the balls and strikes concept of hitting. She quickly figured out that she doesn't get unlimited pitches after an embarrassing backwards 'K'. Later in the game, after she hit the ball to shortstop, Ritter did her best impression of a limp wristed fairly frolicking from cloud to cloud sprinkling fairy dust on everyone headed to first base. It was no surprise she was out by 24 steps. Cervenka is scheduled to work with Ritter so that she is not confused with a running fairy.
a late night altercation with other members on the squad. Apparently Cervenka doesn't take kindly to people talking after 9:00pm on school nights. Despite all that, Cervenka is still expected back for next weeks contest. Ritter started off the game somewhat confused with the balls and strikes concept of hitting. She quickly figured out that she doesn't get unlimited pitches after an embarrassing backwards 'K'. Later in the game, after she hit the ball to shortstop, Ritter did her best impression of a limp wristed fairly frolicking from cloud to cloud sprinkling fairy dust on everyone headed to first base. It was no surprise she was out by 24 steps. Cervenka is scheduled to work with Ritter so that she is not confused with a running fairy.
The 2 game 8 for 8 hitting streak came to an end for center fielder Justin Smith. Rumors are going around that his bat speed has slowed considerable due to his rapid increase in age. "It is always unfortunate when a great player hangs on to the game just a little too long. It is always nice to see them go out on top rather then struggle and lose their ability and edge," Brown explained while falling down. Their is no question that Smith is an exceptional player, the only question remaining is...how much does he have left in him? Eric 'Ferdy' Furman might be borrowing that wheelchair from Smith soon. The Master Batters tough shortstop played through the pain, after later confirming that his knee had been shattered by a 4th inning line drive off the bat of a TRE Hugger. Furman is expected to play after a short week on the disabled list , however he will most likely be playing with a bike helmet and knee pads next week.
Peanut Carpenter and Andy Carpenter will have higher expectations next week. Peanut Carpenter was unable to achieve her Make a Wish Foundation dream of running the bases and Andy Carpenter has fallen behind on his 1 diving catch per game goal.
The Master Batters go up against another undefeated opponent in next weeks contest. It will be a good test to see how good the Master Batters really are. For some players, it might be best to stay in bed and avoid unlikely injuries, for others it might help to get out there and take some swings at the local batting cage.
No comments:
Post a Comment